Building Community Around Maternal Mental Health
I was three months into maternity leave after my son was born, and the transition into motherhood was just… intense. No one could have truly prepared me for the sheer scale of change: my time, my attention, my energy, and my overall mood, everything shifted once that baby arrived. My whole existence centered around keeping this beautiful baby alive, healthy, and loved.
While that love was wonderful and unlike anything I'd ever experienced, I slowly started noticing a quiet loss: the connection with the people around me. Going out felt like a huge logistical hurdle. I was worried about nap times, feeding schedules, and managing all the "stuff" like the stroller, the diapers, and the bottles. It was so overwhelming that the thought of socializing felt genuinely draining. And don't forget, I was functioning on maybe three or four hours of sleep a day.
Perhaps you can relate?
The Motherhood Disconnect
That deep desire to reconnect with yourself through hobbies, time with friends, or just quiet time alone is still there, of course. But the relentless demands of motherhood make it incredibly hard to actually follow through. Slowly, we start slipping away from who we were. The things that once made us happy or brought a sense of relaxation feel distant and few and far between.
It’s no wonder so many of us find ourselves asking, "Where is the support for mothers?" or "Where is the village?" I hear this often from the mothers I work with in therapy. Having a strong sense of community is absolutely crucial; it acts as a protective shield against mental health challenges like depression and anxiety. After all, statistics show that one in five women will experience postpartum depression during or after pregnancy in the United States, and perinatal mood and anxiety disorders (PMADs) remain the number one complication after childbirth.
Recent studies back this up, showing that when a mother perceives herself to have high levels of social support, this acts as a powerful buffer against stress and perinatal mood disorders.
What Effective Support Truly Looks Like
So, what does real, effective community support look like for mothers? What I commonly hear is that it’s two-fold:
Practical Support: Help with the dreaded 'mental load' things like chores, coordinating schedules, meal planning, or childcare.
Emotional Support: Feeling genuinely heard, seen, and validated. This kind of connection is what truly reduces that painful sense of loneliness in motherhood.
I want to highlight a recent study from the University of Houston Healthy Start (UHHS) that looked at a community-based intervention for pregnant and postpartum mothers. The findings showed something essential: when medical and birthing professionals, like doulas and midwives, demonstrated consistent follow-through, genuine care, and emotional presence, the mothers' trust in their providers grew over time.
Authenticity and trust are the foundation of any solid relationship. From my own experience in the therapy room, I know there's often deep shame and fear around asking for help, specifically the fear of being judged as an "unfit mother." What really stood out in the UHHS study was that when providers showed genuine care and consistent follow-through, mothers felt safer to let their guard down, ask for help, and truly receive support because they knew the person on the other end sincerely cared.
Another missing factor is a sense of sisterhood in the community, women getting together, laughing, sharing real-life experiences, and encouraging one another. Being seen by someone "who gets it" is the key ingredient that helps create community along the often-solitary journey of motherhood.
This research study (which I'll link below!) shows just how vital it is to build community around maternal mental health. The program's intervention was successful because it provided a consistent caring presence, fostered a culture of sisterhood where mothers felt understood, and offered practical support. This combination made it possible for mothers to reconnect back to the parts of themselves that felt lost.
You Deserve Your Village
Motherhood is one of the biggest life transitions you may ever go through, but it doesn’t mean you have to lose yourself along the way. Consistent, supportive connections can make all the difference. Whether it’s through therapy, support circles, or a trusted mom group, you deserve a space where you can be cared for too.
What does real community support look like for you? I’d love to know!
Learn more about my therapy services here: https://worthytolivetherapy.com/individual-therapy.
Stay connected for more resources on birth trauma, postpartum mental health, and motherhood:
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Research study link: Sampson, M., Xu, W., York, F. N., & Roberson, J. (2025). A community-based intervention for mental health and wellbeing in pregnancy and postpartum: One Healthy Start site’s story. International Journal of Women’s Health, 17, 385–397. https://doi.org/10.2147/IJWH.S474015
Until next time,
Brittany Moffitt, LCSW-C
